how...


does someone like me
forget


someone like you



how...

do i get rid


of this horrible emptiness


this void


i feel.




how...


do i stop myself

from thinking of you.



antes de dormir. despues de despertarse. solo tu.




i need a new heart


one that won't long
for that which i can't have.





sana kasi masaya ka na lang. in my face kasi that you'd rather be lonely, sad and depressed over someone else than be with me.

take me to a place

of wooden canes and tophats
and parasols
and old ladies in sunday dresses
on mondays

of ladies in red dresses
and weddings in the park

take me to a place...
take me back to that place


of chilling in the afternoon wind
in the heat of the midday sun.

of falling leaves off longing branches
and fields of large red roses
and sunflowers
between stretches of nothingness.

where worlds of rainbows and butterflies
exist

not just in dreams.

take me back.
take me back.

from love. (from pain.)

i run. i hide.


yet


for love. (for pain.)

i hunger.

*and now, more than a year after, i tremble cause of the same fears

are you being or seeming?


take off that mask you're wearing.




i wanna see you for who you are.

and

just like that


i take it all back.



time to let you go.


i can't afford to love you.
i can't afford to love. period.

i love you

with every tear I shed.

With every word I utter.

with each time I close my eyes

and smile

cause of you-filled thoughts.

The worst irony there is.

How thoughts of you can bring

Both smiles and tears.

and it boils down to this.


it all boils down to this.


wasted efforts.

false hopes.




down to one single phrase.





which is it?





the sight of your lips
ALMOST next to mine.

so close. so close.












puro physical. physical. thazzit.


i want emotional attachment.

emotional attachment.

without fear of getting hurt.


yoko na maging sawi. lagi nalang.

i face my fate.


with a chain
strapped to my ankle.




i move. i writh. i struggle.



but the chain
holds me down.





who put the chain there anyway??? ME ME ME!!!!! good job.




F-R-I-E-N-D-S.... THAZZIT!!!! no less.